it's been really long since i've been here, life seriously hasn't been interesting at all. almost the whole j2 population has fallen into the mugging mood due to the upcoming A' Levels, it's really really scary, there isn't much of a life now in school for us j2s, it's no wonder why i dread going to school more than ever. for once in my life, i would rather face the four walls in my flat than facing the population of zombies that are in school now ><
*shoots all of you!!!!*
ok maybe i exaggerated quite a bit, but you should get my idea :D
for a moment i was really paranoid, really worried, you look around the school and almost everyone are mugging 3 times the amount you are, and here you are, and here you are still relaxing, taking things at your own pace, and those who are still not mugging much are probably 3 times smarter than you. peer pressure builds in, you'll feel the need to mug, and after which you'll spent the rest of your jc life mugging your ass off without knowing what you were doing, what you are actually missing out in this part of your life.
perhaps i'm more realistic, perhaps i know my own abilities, perhaps that's why i don't want myself to fall into this mood too, without actually knowing what i'm actually working for. yes, people may say that i'm not ambitious, i don't wanna aim high, but who says i'm not? everyone has dreams, i have too! i'm still aiming to study overseas despite my dismal grades, aiming to get a scholarship despite my dismal grades, but ultimately one has to know his own abilites. it's not that i'm gonna slack my ass off and heck about A' Levels, i'm still gonna work doubly hard for it, to do my best, but what i'm trying to put across here is that i don't want to put myself into a situation where my life is just about studying, where i miss out those small parts of my life which may seem insignificant now, but regret later for not cherishing it. furthermore, this little moments may not take up a lot of time too, it may just be a game of basketball, or a long dinner with your fellow friends. everyone in jc has to go through this, we've been told that we have much to sacrifice to achieve our As at the end of the day, but did anyone tell us we've to sacrifice them all? No one did.
really miss those j1 years especially looking at the j1s now, where people are truely your friends. many of them now would rather be friends with the books than with you. this is life isn't it? i'm perhaps living in this little dream of mine that friends will be friends forever, but econs tells me that it only happens in ceteris paribus condition, as many out there view it differently. life, to them, are split into different stages, and friends in each stage are there to accompany them throughout that stage, and when that stage ends, they move on and meet new friends. the process will go on and on, that's the realistic side of the world. 10 years from now, how many of my friends will i keep in contact with? somehow, living in that dream is much more pleasant to me >< i want to bring them to the next stage of my life, but the question is, how many will follow?
nonetheless i have to accept that this really is life, we're in this crossroad between teenage and adulthood.
wait wait this is a honda crossroad, not a cross road.
ya crossroad :D
back to the point, wearing that brown firemen uniform is a symbol of our teenagehood, and if you didn't realise, it's the last 3 months that we can try to convince ourselves that we are still teenagers, able to enjoy the innocence, the protection that we enjoy. Hah our uniform is like bullet proof vest, but once we stop wearing it, it's time to face the shots and bullets aiming at us. Bang!
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random post really, just thought of a lot of stuffs during this period when i'm trying to mug/failing to mug. but the point is, work hard, play hard, live hard. stupid A' Levels i promise i'll destroy/conquer/slap/kick/reducto/avada kedavra/disintegrate you!!!! gah gah gah
back to mugging D:
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crazy
contemplative
